Keeping the fire alive

One of the most common ways that we talk about vitality is in terms of “keeping the fire alive.” - Richard Leider

I have been revisiting my manuscript for my book, A Crone in the Woods. I wrote the bulk of it a few years back, and for reasons I don’t fully understand, I never completed it. I had some initial interest with publishers, but nothing concrete - although I did receive lots of good feedback and encouragement from the places I submitted it. I spent a bulk of the pandemic working on it and then lost interest until now. I ended up launching this Substack with that name instead.

This morning, I pulled it up to look for one specific chapter I wrote about friction fire. I called that chapter Bad Ass Nana. Learning to start a fire with a bow drill was one of the most challenging survival skills I’ve learned. It took me the better part of a weekend. I spent hours failing and trying again. When I finally had an actual fire started, I was jubilant. That flame ignited something deep within me and burned away messages I had held about who I was and what was possible for me. I’ll save that for the book!

One of the joys of winter is sitting by a fire. Even the flame of a candle will do! The week after Christmas, before the new year starts, is a favourite time of the year for me. I make room to spend a lot of time in reflection. I enjoy reading my journals and reflecting on the past year. And then I move on to thinking about what’s next. This past year was full. I reworked several courses and workshops and created four new workbooks. I organized and facilitated a women’s retreat in the fall. I spoke at an event in June that was a last-minute request to fill in for the keynote speaker. It was a stretch stepping into Carol Orsborn’sshoes, but with her endorsement and support, it went well. I could go on and on. I spent time with amazing people who see aging as the culmination of life.I am feeling grateful for the opportunities that came my way, personally and professionally.

So what’s next?

For most of December, I’ve been asking myself where I want to focus in 2026. I will be working more closely with Sage-ing International. I will fill you in on that in my next post. That commitment makes it even more important that I choose wisely where to spend my time and energy.I’ve learned to plan about 3-4 months out and avoid pressuring myself to be productive. My Big Hairy Audacious Goal-setting days are behind me. (Remember BHAGS?) I’m more aligned with the feminine energy of the HAG now. (See Hagitude by Sharon Blackie for more on the Hag.)

After much reflection, I’ve decided that this season is calling me to fire tending. I feel like I’m being invited to slow down this month and spend some time listening and writing. It’s a good time of the year here in Canada to withdraw. I like the term, wintering. If it appeals to you, I recommend reading Wintering, the book that popularized the term. I will be close to the proverbial hearth. A good fire needs fuel and air to flourish. I need the same thing. I’ll be taking some time to discern what is next, so I can sit with you by the fire, nourished and ready to do the work of becoming wise elders.

Thanks for being part of this community. I appreciate every subscriber. Thank you to those of you who have supported me here at Substack, by taking courses, purchasing workshops, attending events or buying me a hot chocolate.

One must never let the fire go out in one’s soul, but keep it burning.” — Vincent van Gogh

If you want to tend your fire:

1. One of my favourite creations this year! The Wisdom Board™ approach to reflecting on what’s important now in your life. I hosted an online workshop, and if you missed it, I encourage you to spend an afternoon alone or with a friend creating your own Wisdom Board™. It’s a grounding way to start the new year. Find out more here.

2. I will be starting a Crone Circle in February. You can find out more about them here.

3. I am opening two spots for Integration Coaching in the next month. If you are wondering what’s next in this season of life, email me.