Over the past few weeks, I have had the opportunity to hang out with four younger women. All of them are in their early 50s. It’s an interesting stage of life, and I want to acknowledge that 50 today isn’t what it was when I turned 50, a mere 18 years ago.
I saw the picture below on social media and made a screen shot. Unfortunately, I edited out whoever posted it, so I can’t give credit, although being on IG, it is probably difficult to find the source anyway.
The first woman I spent time with has a 6-year-old daughter. We were hanging out together because my youngest granddaughter and her daughter are good friends. We talked about a wedding she was attending on the weekend - her 80+-year-old mother was remarrying.
I had dinner with a single woman who is trying to figure out dating and parenting two teenage boys. She is wondering how to meet men who are normal. Apparently the dating apps aren’t as effective at screening as she had hoped. I had coffee with another woman who has found love at midlife but is adapting to life with aging parents. And I had lunch the same day with a friend who just lost her mother the week before. Aside from menopause, their lives are all very different.
I felt energized after each of those conversations. I wasn’t there to offer advice. From my perspective, they are all finding their way with a great deal of self-awareness.
But if I had been asked for advice?
I would say, “The next ten years will slip by faster than you expect. Lay a good foundation for the next stage of life (physically, emotionally, spiritually and intellectually). Menopause is a lot to navigate - be grateful there is a rich conversation and good resources available. Find a circle of female friends and invest in those relationships. Recognize the voice of ageism that you have internalized. Aging is a gift.”
I think they will likely be surprised by how their lives unfold. If I could sit across the table from my 50-year-old self, I’d tell her:
You have no idea what’s ahead. Some of the most interesting work of your life is still to come. And you’ll be surprised how much you love being 68.