Day 23: If it feels right

My book club is reading Finding Meaning in the Second Half of Life: How to Really Grow Up by James Hollis. As a group of 60+ women, we are discovering that we have already figured out a lot of what Hollis is saying in this book. There are, however, some good reminders.

Today I read:

“The great religious leaders who we venerate almost always suffered rejection and persecution, yet faithfully served their vocatus, which is why we venerate them. The transient vacuities of our cultural icons—success, peace, happiness, and distraction—pale before the question of whether or not one experiences this life as meaningful. Moreover, the test of meaning is not a cognitive decision, so one should not suddenly quit this present life for any quixotic mission. Meaning is found, over the long haul, through the feeling of rightness within. No one can give that to us, although we may allow others to take it away from us.”

I've been thinking recently about consolation and desolation. My word for 2026 is Alignment, and the practice of noticing consolation and desolation has become an important discernment tool for me. It helps me pay attention to whether my life is aligned with what feels most right.

James Hollis calls it the feeling of rightness.

I've found that journaling helps me pay attention. When I find myself repeatedly pouring negative feelings about a situation onto the page each morning, I take it as a flag. Something may be out of alignment. When I find myself writing with gratitude about an experience or a choice, I can follow that feeling toward a sense of consolation. I have come to see this as one way the divine may be leading me toward a deeper sense of what is right for me.

Of course, discernment isn't always that simple. Feelings can be complicated, and sometimes we need someone outside ourselves to help us listen more carefully to what is happening within.

But I've come to trust that paying attention matters.

Perhaps alignment isn't about finally knowing exactly what we're supposed to do.

Perhaps it is about becoming quiet enough to notice what brings us closer to the life we are meant to live.