Day 13: Things don’t hold our memories.

Today, my mom tried to give me a couple of brass ducks and a brass teacup and saucer. I declined the ducks. But when she told me the teacup had belonged to her mother, I thought maybe one of my grandkids would want it.

Sometimes, to be honest, I take things just to help her let go of them.

Recently, I had a discussion with one of my siblings about my mom’s approach to distributing her things. She has done a great job of getting rid of a lifetime of accumulation. Her cupboards are bare. She has two empty rooms in her house. There is a bathroom she needs to remember to flush because no one ever uses it. She has given away a lot of stuff.

Mostly, her approach has been simple: if someone asks for something, she gives it to them. It’s been a little frustrating.

A neighbour is getting her beautiful cuckoo clock that my grandkids would love to have. My niece is getting a wall hanging that we all want.

There may be hurt feelings after she dies. But I suppose in a family with three children, it should be expected that all of us will want some of the same things.

For the most part, though, I think that because we are all in our 60s now, the three of us are thinking less about accumulating things and more about getting rid of our own stuff.

No one needs more stuff. Our memories are not in the things. We don't need to have the clock on the wall to remember the kids waiting to see the little bird emerge on the hour. We will have the stories.

And I'll have a brass teacup and saucer.