• Sandy Reynolds

Why the heart wants what it wants

Emily Dickinson wrote, “The heart wants what it wants.” But if you want a more recent version of that saying check out this Selena Gomez video. We may be living in a different era but women are still ignoring their intuition and red flags so they can have what they think they want or need. I recently read an article in Chatelaine magazine on the cult Nxivm. You can read it here. It was about a young woman who joined the cult. I saw the same pattern laid out that I have seen in so many spiritual memoirs. There were warnings all along the way - but they were ignored. Why do we do that? It has nothing to do with intelligence. Jana Lalich, an American scholar who has spent 35 years researching cults and extremist groups says in the Chatelaine article, “The idea that a person can be ‘too smart’ for a cult’s pitch is a persistent an inaccurate myth. In fact, says Lalich, it’s often the opposite: Intelligent people tend to share characteristics like curiosity and idealism that can make them more susceptible.”

This week on Reframe Your Life I talk about red flags and some questions you need to ask yourself when you are questioning a course of action. I created a worksheet with questions you can answer. Download it here. Listen to the episode here. As women we need to start listening to ourselves. We need to trust our intuition. Stop ignoring red flags in your personal life and in relationships and organizations you are a part of. Ask the hard questions you are avoiding. What the heart wants is love, joy, peace, belonging and all those beautiful qualities that nurture our souls. But the heart can mislead us when it thinks we can find those things in toxic people and abusive organizations. So give it what it needs, not what it wants.

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