Maybe something is right with you!
How are you? I’ve been in a bit of a funk lately. I’m not depressed - I am enjoying life. I’m also functioning okay. It is more of a creative funk. I haven’t felt inspired.
At first, I thought it was winter. I love the idea of wintering, and I’ve been exploring it more this year through the writing of Jacqueline Suskin. It’s easy for me to embrace cozy and comfy. A good book, a warm blanket, and a cup of tea, and I’m set. I normally find myself quite inspired by quiet time alone. I find myself quite entertaining.
It is nearing the end of February, and I’ve only had flickers of my returning mojo, like random floaters in my vision; they pass by and are gone. They also happen at inconvenient times, like when I’m heading to Costco. By the time I get home, the moment has passed.
This past week, Rob Bell released a podcast episode called “This Must Be the Void.” In it, he discussed periods of low motivation or malaise. He suggested instead of focusing on trying to fix ourselves, we recognize something deeper is going on. (I also found it quite comforting that Rob Bell goes through these times.)
I could relate. I’m a fix-it person. I’ve been wondering if I need to journal more, change my website, go for therapy, find a coach, try cold plunging, or maybe something even more extreme. Like, move to the woods…
A lot is going on globally. I’ve stopped watching the news, and I’ve been limiting my social media time as well. Current events are a shitshow. (I couldn’t find a better word.) Layer them on top of whatever is happening in your life; it can all be overwhelming. Feeling unmotivated is a logical response to the bigger issues facing us globally. It can all feel insurmountable.
I don’t think we are wired for the world we inhabit. We are exposed to so much information and other forms of energy. It is beyond our capacity to handle it. Just trying to process it can drain us of our creativity. Numbing ourselves can feel like the best response.
Are you feeling a lack of creative energy? It may be a sign that something is right with you.
I also sense that I’m in a liminal space. Something is ending, but the next thing hasn’t arrived. All I can do is be ready for the new thing. I’ve been clearing out books that no longer interest me. They represent another time in my life. They were of interest to an earlier Sandy. I can’t imagine revisiting them. They were part of my path, but I’m heading into new terrain and don’t need them for where I am heading.
Have you been feeling in between in your life? If you have been, I’ve got very little advice. You probably don’t need to be fixed. Something is right with you. Ease off any pressure you put on yourself to be doing or creating. If you have the energy, look at what you can let go of in your physical, mental, or emotional spaces to prepare for a new beginning.
I’m heading to Toronto for the next few weeks to catsit for my son and his partner. They are both highly creative, and I look forward to being in their space (all the art books). Unlike other times, I am going without a big agenda of how productive I will be. I will enjoy hanging out with Rose and wandering the streets of Leslieville. And if I do nothing else, it is okay.